Season 3

The Negotiation

After Darryl discusses a payrise with Michael, the two of them, plus Toby, go to corporate in order to negotiate the raise. Meanwhile, Jim must deal with the consequences of Pam's confession to Roy.

Memorable Office Quotes

Roy: Halpert!
[Roy charges at Jim, Dwight sprays him with pepper spray. Everyone in the office is blinded]
Dwight Schrute: Pam, call security! Every day, for eight years, I have brought pepper spray into this office to protect myself and my fellow employees. And every day, for eight years, people have laughed at me. Well, who's laughing now?

Michael Scott: Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you are getting the best possible information.

Dwight Schrute: No, don't call me a hero. Do you know who the real heroes are? The guys who wake up every morning and go into their normal jobs, and get a distress call from the commissioner, and take off their glasses and change into capes, and fly around fighting crime. Those are the real heroes.

Michael Scott: No need for consternation. Everything is under control.
Jan: Michael, last Friday one of your employees attacked another employee in your office!
Michael Scott: It was a crime of passion, Jan. Not a disgruntled employee. Everyone here is extremely gruntled.

Jim Halpert: I guess, all things considered, I was lucky Dwight was there. And Roy was lucky that Dwight only used pepper spray, and not the nunchucks or the throwing stars.

Toby Flenderson: I don't think Michael intended to punish me by putting Ryan back here with Kelly. But, if he did intend that...wow. Genius.

Darryl: Are you wearing lady clothes? Those look like lady pants.
Michael Scott: No. This is a power suit.
Darryl: That there's a woman's suit.

Michael Scott: There were these huge bins of clothes. And everybody was rifling through them like crazy. And I grabbed one. And it fit. So I don't think that this is totally just a woman's suit. At the very least, it's bisexual.

Pam: Who makes the suit?
Michael Scott: [checks the label, revealing a pink lining] It's a "MissTerious." Which makes sense, because the buttons are on the wrong side. That's part of the mystery.

Michael Scott: Every year, I get a $100 gas card. Can't put a price tag on that!

Kelly: What is so stupid about wanting to name a baby Usher? Usher Jennifer Hudson Kapoor.
Ryan Howard: Don't you see why that's insane?
Kelly: Oh, so I'm crazy now?
Michael Scott: Toby, come on lets go.
Toby Flenderson: Where?
Michael Scott: Where!? I'm gonna smack you in the head with a hammer! Come on, let's go.
Toby Flenderson: Alright.

Darryl: Okay, bring it home now. And don't forget the new black man phrase I taught you.
Michael Scott: Pippity poppity, give me the zoppity.
Darryl: [to camera] Yeah, I taught Mike some new phrases. I want him to get the raise. I...just can’t help myself.

Roy: I just thought you guys were really good friends, or...maybe he was gay or something. Not that that's wrong.

Michael Scott: It was a weird day. I accidentally cross-dressed. And then Darryl made me feel bad for not making any money. And then I had to ride up here with stupid Toby. And then your assistant was all young and hot.

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