Season 3

Branch Closing

When Jan tells Michael that the Scranton Branch will be shutting down, Michael strives to keep his staff's spirits up. Meanwhile, everyone privately begins to envision how their lives will change in the aftermath.

Memorable Quotes

Dwight Schrute: When you become close with someone, you develop a kind of sixth sense. You can read their moods like a book. And right now, the title of Michael's book is.. "Something Weird Is Going On...colon...What Did Jan Say? The Michael Scott Story...by Michael Scott. With Dwight Schrute."

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Jan: I am here to tell you that we are closing the Scranton branch.
Michael Scott: I don't understand.
Jan: The board voted last night to close your branch.
Michael Scott: On whom's authority?
Jan: The boards.

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Jan: A small number of people will be transferred to the Stamford branch, and the rest will be getting severance packages.
Michael Scott: Am I a small number person or a severance package person?
Jan: Well, we haven't made final decisions about personnel yet...but you're a severance package person.

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Jan: Our CFO believes that Josh is going to play an important role in our company's future.
Michael Scott: Oh really, what role is that? King of the stupid universe?

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Michael Scott: It is an outrage, that's all. They're making a huge, huge mistake. Let's see Josh replace these people. Let's see Josh find another Stanley. You think Stanleys grow on trees? Well they don't. There is no Stanley tree. Do you think the world is crawling with Phyllises? Show me that farm. With Phyllises and Kevins sprouting up all over the place. Ripe for the plucking. [long pause] Show me that farm.

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Michael Scott: [trying to delicately break the news to his staff] It's over. We are screwed. Dunder Mifflin Scranton is being shut down.

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Jim Halpert: I don't have a ton of contact with the Scranton branch, but before I left, I took a box of Dwight's stationery, so from time to time I send Dwight faxes. From himself. From the future. [reading fax] "Dwight, at 8am today, someone poisons the coffee. Do not drink the coffee. More instructions will follow. Cordially, Future Dwight."
[Dwight receives the fax and reads it. He spots Stanley about to drink a cup of coffee]
Dwight Schrute: Noooooooooo! [smacks the cup out of Stanley's hands] You'll thank me later.